I know he can be a handful sometimes, but he loves when you make him laugh.” Pointing out their strengths and including them in situations reminds them that they are an important part of the family. I know it was a long game, she appreciates your support!” or “Thank you for using your humor to help calm your brother down. “Thank you for using your strength of self-regulation sitting quietly and doing your homework during your sister’s game. Remember their strengths and point them out.
This may cause them to desire more attention and even act out to obtain it. They feel “stuck” between their older sister’s constant soccer practices and their younger brother’s constant tantrums. This can cause a feeling of isolation for the middle child.
Their older sibling probably already has activities that they are actively involved in and the younger sibling may require more work and attention. The middle child often feels “on their own” because a big family is a busy family. Here I am, stuck in the middle with you.” Stealers Wheel, “Stuck in the Middle With You” “Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right, Put your phone down, get comfortable, be engaged and listen to what your child is saying. Remember the last time your kid had more than one friend over for a sleepover? How quickly did that end in tears?Īctive listening is important with all of your children, being present and in the moment when you are having a conversation lets them know you are truly engaged and listening to them, but it can be critically important to your middle child, especially if they are already vulnerable to feeling left out or forgotten. It’s a ‘numbers game’ and three is one of the most difficult to manage. It can be hard to have three peers together because typically two feel more unity than the one. Those types of situations are likely to make one child feel left out. Try to avoid two-person centric tasks and activities. This will show all of your children, that they are unique, special and have different strengths that set them apart. One way to make sure all of your children feel special is to take the VIA Survey of Character strengths (link) and share everyone’s top strengths. Whether we’re talking about your first child, middle child, or sixth child, all of your children have their own unique strengths. Little girl your in the middle of the ride,Įverything, everything will be just fine.Įverything, everything will be all right.” Jimmy Eat World, “The Middle”Īnother hit song called “The Middle”, this one by Jimmy Eat World, encourages everyone to be themselves and to be their best. “Live right now, just be yourself.įor someone else. Let’s break some of these stereotypes by focusing on your middle child’s strengths. That feeling of not being able to live up to her sister and feeling trapped and forgotten in the middle certainly doesn’t have to be the destiny of any middle child. Not only was Jan stuck in-between her younger sister Cindy and older sister Marcia, but she was also placed in a fantastical and unique fictional family dynamic dead father, blended family featuring another trio of siblings, unrealistic expectations to live up to the popularity and success of her older sister…the famous expression of her exacerbation “ Marcia, Marcia, Marcia” is seared into our collective consciousness. Nowhere else in pop-culture has the middle child stereotype been more grossly overstated and exaggerated than in Jan Brady, the classic middle child from the 70’s hit sitcom The Brady Bunch. “Marcia, Marcia, Marcia” Jan Brady, The Brady Bunch The stereotypes of “middle child syndrome” are as well-known and accurate, and often inaccurate, as any other stereotype. Hand me down jeans and tag-along hobbies. Becoming the de facto “negotiator” in the family. You probably heard the hit song “The Middle” more often than a middle child heard themselves called by their proper names during the course of their entire childhood. We’re not sure if Maren Morris is a middle child or not, but for middle children everywhere just hearing the word “middle” can cause you to shudder. So why don’t you just meet me in the middle?” Maren Morris, “The Middle”
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